Probably eating smaller things than us’
They are Kentish Town Cats: Lillian, Peggy Sue and former street hobo Clarence. Twitter-dwelling feline “purveyors of profanity, and very little else of worth or value”, they’ve been marauding the streets of the ‘hood and “shitting in your garden” for over a decade. Often to be found being forcibly ejected from one of our reputable local hostelries, they boast of an “insatiable appetite for sausages” – and all things Kentish Town. Follow them on @kentishtowncats
When were you happiest?
Clarence: When I got my feet under the table here.
Lillian and Peggy: BC – Before Clarence.
Where would you like to live?
The house on the corner of Evangelist Rd and Burghley Rd. Always looks very cosy and inviting of an evening.
What is your greatest life acheivement?
Why our kentishtowncats Twitter account, of course.
What is the most important lesson life has taught you?
Never, ever, trust a stoat.
What makes you unhappy?
The evil spewed by renowned cat racist Chris Packham.
What simple thing would improve the quality of your life?
Lillian and Peggy: the removal of that big goon, Clarence.
Probably eating smaller things than us.
What is your guilty pleasure?
Shitting in Giles Coren’s veg patch.
What is your favourite sound or smell?
Not a particular favourite, but you can get high by walking past a certain flat on the corner of Burghley Rd and Highgate Rd.
Where do you hang out?
All the usual Kentish suspects. Not just the ‘cool’ places though, we can often be found sinking a few Guinness in the Boston Arms.
What’s your best experience in NW5?
We always enjoy a skank along with the Dig It Soundsystem at the street parties.
What do you most dislike about your appearance?
Seriously? You’ve seen us, right?
What’s the worst thing anyones said to you?
We were rather hurt when Red Face Mary called us “Bumbaclarts” rather than “Buttercups”.
What has your career taught you?
Cats don’t fucking work.
What is your favourite dish?
We’re partial to vole. Alas, they’re few and far between around these parts.
What did you do today?
Fuck all. Does licking our arseholes count?
Describe yourself as an animal.
Are you pissed?
Got a suggestion for Ich Bin, feline or otherwise? Email info@kentishtowner.co.uk. And if you’re a fan of the column why not buy the T-shirt or tote bag?
